Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Unexpected Phone Call

Monday evening. Dinner eaten. Dishes, well, I was thinking about doing them. I am sitting down on my favorite chair. I decided to watch a few minutes of the last episode of How I met Your Mother. 
Phone rings.
"Hei, T täällä." (Hi, it's T.)
So the conversation started.
Something was off. T. does not usually call at night so late. Her voice sounded more subdued than usually. I listened again. Yes, definitely something  was not right. Husband? Or had he actually come to his senses?
Something was off.
Finally she said it.
"They found something. It's cancer. Breast cancer."
I was not prepared to hear these words.
Is anyone ever prepared to hear them?
She lives 400 miles away from me. Her family is an ocean away.
"Who is going to take you to the hospital? Your hubby?"
"No, not sure, maybe a friend."
I am ready to scream at the above mentioned hubby at this point.
No point, she says. He just does not care.
I am so sad. How do you find the right words? On the phone when you can't see the other person?
How do you comfort someone who has known for years that this might become a reality one day?
How do you give hope? What words do you use?
We prayed. I can't be with her, so I have to trust that God will be there with her.
I don't know what to do, so I have to trust that God knows what He is doing. I can't bring healing, so I pray for healing. I ask for a miracle.
Not for me, but for T.


30 comments:

  1. I am so sorry that your friend is experiencing such pain. And to be by herself. I will keep her, and your, her friend of 400 miles, in my prayers. I am sorry.

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    1. Thank you Deborah! Your prayers are much appreciated!

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  2. The words are never easy, but the prayers of comfort, of strength, of fighting this head on, of healing. Keep praying for her and over her. T needs to hear those words - to trust in our God who is mighty and good even in the valleys of life. Pray and be with her however you can. And I know you will.

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    1. Michelle, thank you for your advice and words of encouragement.

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  3. Oh Jaana the pain of separation. Thinking of you all. Praying...

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  4. Oh, Jaana...I'm so very sorry to hear about this. I felt your pain and your friends pain radiating through this post. Being separated from those we love at hard times can bring such a feeling of powerlessness. Glad you are trusting in the One who has the power. He is there even when support lacks from those who should be providing it, like your friend's husband. I am sure you were a blessing and a comfort to your friend as you listened to her and prayed with her over the phone.

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    1. Laura, thank you for your words. There just might be more prayers said over the phone in the future.

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  5. Sometimes all you can do is to listen. None of the words we say would take away the fears of a person with such news. I believe in doctors and hope they will provide the best cure possible. Sending good thoughts your friend's way.

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    1. Thank you Terje! I will remember to listen more in the future.

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  6. I've been in your shoes.
    Walking beside someone as they travel this road is oh so difficult.
    Add the separation of miles....and you have something that feels impossible.

    Yet, prayer is the most valuable thing we can do.
    Praying for strength, wisdom, comfort, and peace for you both.

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  7. So sorry. Listening matters even over the miles you are there for her. I'm trying to find the words to help too. Know you and your friend are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm listening.

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  8. The fact that she called you is important, Jaana. Your words even from far away will be a comfort, & it sounds like you did what you could, prayed, talked, didn't shy away from this difficult thing. A friend with breast cancer (years ago) told me that some friends disappeared. Since that also happened to me with my husband, I'm no longer surprised, but sad that some cannot even face helping. Your care will be so important to your friend. Best wishes to her & to you!

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    1. Thank you Linda! I need to remember to call her more often as well as she does not like online communication.

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  9. This is a phone call that changed everything! I'm so happy that she reached out to you -- her earthly comfort -- because she knows you will connect her to something so much bigger, God's comfort. I'm glad you are trusting her care to the One who can and who will. Peace to you as you carry the load alongside T.

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  10. These words are always hard to hear whether you are close or separated by miles. Listening, praying, and just being there are sometimes all you can do and all the person needs. My thoughts and prayers are with your friend.

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    1. Thank you for your prayers. Walking alongside.....

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  11. Good that she has you. Life moves along until an event like this stops you in your daily tracks. We are with you Jaana so you can be with her.

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  12. How difficult it is to hear those words and be so far away. You do support your friend just by being a phone call away. Many prayers are now headed her way, and your way too.

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    1. Elsie, prayers are so appreciated! Thank you!

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  13. Phone calls like these are never easy to receive and it was just as hard for T to make. She reached out to you and you were there for her. Even though there is many miles between, that call brought you closer. I will pray for your friend T and you. Our faith in God will get you through this difficult time. Just be there for her, listen and pray.

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    1. Thank you Judy! It is comforting to know so many are praying.

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  14. Your friend is supported so much by you. That she reached out to you and knew you would be there for her says so much about your friendship and your love for each other. I will included you both in my prayers. You always write with such passion and honesty.

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  15. Such a scary feeling! I am glad that you were there for your friend and I know you will continue to be there for her in the coming weeks, months, etc. Prayers of strength and healing coming to you and your friend.

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